tjdiz

Notes: 1 / 1 week ago

that feeling.

You ever experience having a crush on someone way back in the day, but never acting on it? You walk your separate paths over the years, then one day reunite. You spend hours walking with them, talking with them. Then it hits you. You remember exactly why you had such a huge crush on them in the first place.

1 month ago

"I can be civil if I happen to run into you, but let’s face it…there’s not one reason we need to associate with one another anymore."

2 months ago

Sometimes math can be funny.

Notes: 165 / 2 months ago from reasonstolovebeingalive

(Source: favim.com)

Notes: 1 / 2 months ago

Finally something decent to go long driving in. I still love my SE-R though :D

Notes: 1655 / 2 months ago from therulesofagentleman

Word.

(Source: therulesofagentleman)

Notes: 16171 / 3 months ago from mols

You should date a girl who reads.

mols:

a love story for love day :P

What better way to spend Valentine’s Day than blogging about my recent love interests. So here it is. The girl, a long time acquaintance, never really saw her in a way that would earn my attraction. Of course, typical me… She happens to be six years younger than I. Not intentional, but I’m sure some people beg to differ :P I managed to get her number one day and we started talking. It started off as simple questions…. You know the ones you ask when you get to know someone like “what school did you go to?” or “what’s your favourite colour?” Those few messages a day , eventually became longer texts. All of a sudden, boomed to hundreds of texts a day. Literally from good morning messages until night to the point where we could not stay awake anymore. Anyone who knows me knows I put a lot of effort into a message. I will entertain the conversation until it’s obvious the other person needs to go. With her, she was like me. There was no effort needed to talk to one another, it just flowed and there wasn’t a dull moment. It was then and there I knew I had fallen for this girl. I had fallen in love with her personality. We had the same interests, it made things so simple. So one morning after this ordeal had begun, I laid it out and told her I had feelings for her. I’ve never been so scared in my life. I had been heartbroken recently so I don’t know why I was so eager to risk it again. I guess I felt like she was worth the leap. I have never connected with anyone like I did with her. At that moment, she had not admitted she liked me back but I could tell she was interested. There was no awkwardness after. We just kept doing what we were doing. As each day went by we grew closer and closer. It even got to the point where I would have “dreams” about her and she would ask me details. Details. Yes those kind. From that point, our texts became more flirty to the point where I could not concentrate in class, and had to leave. Bad I know.

Now here is the problem. I probably should have mentioned earlier that she has a boyfriend. Logically I knew what we were doing was wrong, and so did she. I knew I had changed since my breakup of last year, but it wasn’t until now I saw the difference. I noticed my confidence level was at an all time high. I felt like this girl was mine and no matter what I did, I would be able to steal her away. We were at my place one time just flirting and joking around and she just straight up asked me “Are you so confident that I would sleep with you right now?” to that, I answered “Yes.” When I look at that, I’m still surprised at how that turned out. The old me would’ve panicked and just started giggling. Before anyone asks me, we didn’t do anything so don’t think otherwise :P

It was terrible how bad things went. When it came to texting, I would be the choice over her boyfriend. When it came to spending time together, it would be me again. In the span of two weeks it seemed like we lived out an entire honeymoon phase despite not even being together officially. She came over a few times and we kept our distance from each other knowing fully what could possibly happen if we got close. Being distracted for a few weeks, I asked her if she wanted to come over and study since we both needed much catching up to do in our classes. So that day comes around and there we are, she’s doing her work on my desk while I’m just laying on my bed typing my own work. This lasts maybe a few minutes before she gives up and of course I do too. She just comes to me and starts showing me these funny videos on YouTube and all this time I unintentionally had my arm around her. I thought to myself, she didn’t notice so I’m sure she doesn’t mind. With no other videos to watch, I asked if she wanted to watch a movie. So I picked two random ones. X-Men Origins: Wolverine or My Sassy Girl. We ended up watching X-Men first. I had to get up and find the movie on my computer. I laid back down and noticed she was a few feet away from me. So what did I do? I pulled her close and played the big spoon. She kept glancing at me throughout the movie and I asked her if she was even watching. To which she replied “no.” She then asked me “Is it bad that all I can think about is kissing you?” I had no idea how to respond so instinctively I just said “Yes, that’s bad” So while we’re watching the movie she gets a phone call from her boyfriend. Awkward! Instantly I released her from my arms as this conversation progressed. Eventually they finish talking and I can see she starts feeling guilty. At the same time, she refuses to leave and just kept her arms around me. It was the greatest feeling in the world, but at the same time I felt like maybe this was too good to be true. So many hours have passed and despite her requests for a kiss, I had declined many times. The movie was done. We spent minutes, which felt like an eternity just staring into each other’s eyes. All I remember was “one kiss, that’s all” and I hesitated! I had already partially thrown my morals out the window so why was I holding back now? Part of me knew she had already cheated. I had her heart, feelings, attention, and time. Pretty much everything except that title “her boyfriend.” My willpower for the evening eventually depleted and I gave in, I kissed her. She eventually asked to go home and I knew from her tone it wasn’t looking in my favour. Earlier that night I told her she had to choose one of us. It was either me or her boyfriend. As you can probably tell, she went with him still. He doesn’t know what went on, and probably never will. The fear of the unknown was not something she wanted to risk. I respect her honesty in saying so, but I feel like it’s a waste of something amazing. Which brings us to today. We no longer speak and friendship is not an option. Once you learn too much about someone, it’s difficult to go back. Or who knows, I could just be that “mistake” she’s trying to forget :P

3 months ago

Should have been ages ago. Maturity growth I suppose. Make peace. Nothing’s worth a grudge.

that feeling.

You should date a girl who reads.

a love story for love day :P

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